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Everything posted by Kunoichi

  1. Kunoichi

    What is Emetophobia?

    Emetophobia, or fear of vomiting, is surprisingly common. The phobia can begin at any age, although many adults have suffered for as long as they can remember. Emetophobia may be related to other fears, such as fear of food, as well as conditions such as eating disorders and obsessive-compulsive disorder. Causes of Emetophobia The fear of vomiting is often, but not always, triggered by a negative experience with vomiting. Although cases of stomach flu, overindulging in alcohol and food poisoning happen to everyone, it is easy to feel alone. The risk of emetophobia may be higher if you remember vomiting in public or experiencing a long night of uncontrollable vomiting. Some experts believe that emetophobia may be linked to worries about lack of control. Many people try to control themselves and their environment in every possible way, but vomiting is difficult or impossible to control. It sometimes happens at times and in places that are embarrassing or inconvenient, which can be highly distressing. Symptoms of Emetophobia Interestingly, most people with emetophobia rarely, if ever, vomit. Some sufferers report that they have not thrown up since childhood. Yet they constantly worry that it might happen. If you have emetophobia, you may have developed certain behavioral patterns or even obsessions in an effort to keep yourself safe. You might be most comfortable in a particular room of your home, or even outside. You might sleep with a towel next to you in case you are ill overnight. You probably feel compelled to learn the most direct path to a restroom in any new building. You may be extremely anxious about long car trips. Many sufferers report that they feel safer when they do all the driving. Some are reluctant to carry passengers, who might see them vomit if they cannot reach a restroom in time. Many emetophobia sufferers experience frequent nausea and digestive upsets. These are extremely common symptoms of anxiety, and can lead to a self-replicating cycle. You are afraid to vomit, and the fear causes nausea and stomach pain. This makes you feel like vomiting, which in turn makes you more afraid. Research indicates that this cycle may be the result in hypervigilent sensitivity to gastrointestinal symptoms and misappraisal of nausea and other GI symptoms. Complications of Emetophobia Over time, you might develop additional fears or obsessions. Cibophobia, or fear of food, is common among many with emetophobia. You may worry that foods are not cooked or stored properly, thus leading to possible food poisoning. You might begin to severely restrict your diet or refuse to eat until you are completely full. Many sufferers feel that being full can lead to nausea and vomiting. In extreme cases, you might even develop tendencies toward anorexia. Many people with emetophobia develop social anxiety or even agoraphobia. You might be reluctant to spend time with people for fear of vomiting in front of them. Alternately, you may be afraid that someone will vomit in front of you. It is not unusual to become highly afraid of other people’s vomit as well as your own. Treating Emetophobia Emetophobia can be somewhat complicated to diagnose and treat, since many people simultaneously experience other phobias and anxiety disorders. Therefore, it is important to work with a trusted therapist with a broad range of experience. See “Finding a Therapist.” for tips and suggestions. Cognitive-behavioral therapy can help you confront your fears and replace your negative thoughts regarding vomiting. Hypnosis and relaxation techniques can help to reduce the feelings and symptoms of anxiety. Medications may be indicated in some cases. Although it will take a great deal of work, emetophobia can be defeated. There is no reason that your life must be controlled by this powerful but treatable phobia. Sources: American Psychiatric Association. (1994). Diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders (4th Ed.). Washington, DC: Author. International Emetophobia Society. “What Is Emetophobia?” December 31, 2008. http://www.emetophobia.org/emetophobia%20fear%20of%20vomiting.asp http://phobias.about.com/od/phobiaslist/a/emetophobia.htm
  2. I saw this and thought it was interesting. Maybe it will help someone Here are some ideas for feel-good things to do when you feel depressed. It is amazing how doing something for others will lift your spirits. Write a pen pal letter to a service member stationed overseas. If you can afford it, send a care package to troops overseas. Adopt a pen pal orphaned child in Africa or your favorite country. Adopt an orphan here in America and write them letters. Join Big Brothers/Big Sisters and take a child to the zoo. Offer to take a disadvantaged family from your child's school on an outing. Visit a nursing home to read books, sing, or play a musical concert for patients and residents. Take a nursing home resident for a walk in the courtyard area. Share pictures with them that they can use to decorate their room. Help them write a letter to a loved one. Arrange to speak about your career at a public school, church, or community college program for career exploration. There are also community outreach programs to help train disadvantaged people how to find jobs. Offer to do mock interviews with people who use these organizations. Offer to give a class in how to write a resume and a letter of application. Arrange to speak about your business, creative, or technology skills at a Chamber of Commerce luncheon. Volunteer to tutor in a school or an adult literacy program at the local library. "Adopt" an elderly or disabled person in your neighborhood and offer to take them to the grocery store, to doctor's appointments, to a movie, or shopping for clothes. Gather clothes, books, magazines, games, and other unwanted stuff in your house and donate those things to a local Hospice Center. Visit a Veterans Hospital and play some games or read to a disabled vet. Donate magazines, books, old computers and games to VA Hospitals. Volunteer to work in a hospital in the gift shop or at the information desk. Volunteer to do arts and crafts projects with terminally ill patients at children's hospitals. Make cookies, candy, muffins or other treats for your trash collectors, mail delivery persons, neighbors, teachers, or others to help brighten their day. taken from: http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/320257/feelgood_things_to_do_when_you_feel_pg3.html?cat=5.
  3. Hey guys, Maybe I'm the only one that feels this way or experiences this but when new people come into chat, I feel really anxious and nervous (and type way too much per usual). When I'm in the chat room, to me its like I am with people actually there. So I get very scared and very sensitive and very insecure when someone new comes in. Also its a people pleaser thing and if the person (I feel or believe) doesn't like me (which obviously not everyone will) it messes with me even more. I have that belief that if everyone doesn't like me (which isn't to say that I'm fake just that I try to help everyone I can) then I'm a bad person or that it means I've done something wrong. I know that isn't how it is and I also know mentally that not everyone is going to like me...just a severe people pleaser I guess and just trying to learn not to be. Anyways, just wanted to know if anyone else gets social phobia even in a online environment? I find it hard even on other sites I belong to. Or maybe I'm just weird. Love ya all Kuno
  4. Kunoichi

    PTSD and Flashbacks

    For many of sufferers (myself included) the most difficult thing with dealing with PTSD is the flashbacks (reliving the event of trauma) that occur. This can be triggered by something that is harmless (a color, a smell, a sound) or can be reminders of the actual event itself (seeing the person again, being in a similar environment or situation). The hardest part with what ensues with this is how to cope with it. I'm starting this to see if I can get a few ideas going for myself and others on how to cope and manage them. Put your ideas below if you can. thanks!
  5. Kunoichi

    Mood Swings From Hell

    I am dealing with some extreme mood swings. I'll go from content and happy to suicidal and rageful in the matter of an hour with no situational or provoked reason. I know i need to get back on medication and I'm working on that but its getting very difficult to deal with and manage. I am hurting those around me emotionally and I do not want to do that. Also when I get rageful, it goes inward to where self harming urges become a problem. Does anyone have experience in managing this in a healthy manner? Please help me if you can. Thank you Kuno
  6. Hey guys, Though I could chat about this in chat...I'd rather do it on forum where I can formulate my thoughts a little better. I have noticed with my depression that I experience heavy paranoia in terms of the relationships in my life. How people really do hate me but are friends,in relationships with me due to pity. I get the every increasing thoughts of self-doubt, fear, abandonment issues, and desire to have help but too scared to ask. I know that this is probably a side effect of just my own issues but I notice them increase exponentially the more depressed that I am. I am experiencing this now. Also get sudden urges of anger. I wouldn't call it rage since its controlled, but certainly anger. I get worried that I am just a burden to people, that since I have nothing to offer...why are people with me? This I know is probably my own past as well. Since love was a conditional aspect as was friendship. My best friend of 14 years, who I realize now was unhealthy, was a very conditional love person..but in my mind, she was the only one willing to be friends with a isolationist, fearful and often depressed person. So I clung to that even if it often meant that I was criticized, told that I wasn't pretty, I was naiive, etc etc etc. They aren't all bad memories, but I realize now it was unhealthy. This is kind of going off my intended path, however...I just feel alot of insecurity and paranoia right now. I feel very depressed even when all I do is smile. Don't get me wrong I feel alot of gratitude going on in my life and I don't necessarily have a "negative" outlook on what's going on in my life. I can't change the feelings thought, not by will alone. Also the thought processes/belief systems are firmly in place when depression hits, so even though I "know" that I'm not a burden and people care about me for me (that's what they tell me) and I trust them on that, I still have those feelings and still have those thoughts. I'm not attempting to dwell on them and doing my best to not be hard on myself. Which..as most know..is a very against my nature. Anyways, I guess writing this was both an outlet and perhaps find other people who can relate. It is also to clarify things for myself. Thanks for reading and letting me have a safe place to talk. Love ya Kuno
  7. I am very very phobic of cockaroaches. Not something I tell people because I'm embarassed. I was laying down in bed reading and one flew on my kindle so i've spent last hour 1/2, 2 hours. completely cleaning the entire house..and i mean sterilization. I also may have broken my mom's bf lamp. I need to find lightbulbs (not moving anymore right now) to see if it is. He won't be happy. I'm washing all my clothes and sheets now, vacuumed, bleached every single thing, dusted, had to take a shower and change clothes. Also running a empty dishwasher just in case. I cleaned the entire house in a rush like a tornado was after me. I found one kernel of pop corn in my room so that's probably what attracted it and its wet outside..so maybe its normal but logic doesn't work for me in this case. It beyond freaks me out. I keep looking around, scared to death i'm going to see another one. Some people may few this as stupid but I don't care. This is something that is very real and very difficult for me to deal with. It is also why I'm such a OCD cleaning person. I managed to kill both of them (found a tiny one in another room) while shaking and crying and now i feel like I just want to get sick. Now I'm just trying to stop shaking and crying. So its 5:30 am and I'm not going to sleep. So that means I'll be up all day when I'm already feeling like crap and ill. It's stupid and people don't get it and people say how "common" it is. But I don't know if its normal to spend 2 hours cleaning and re-cleaning and re-sterilizing (house is always clean anyways) because I saw one cockroach. But whatever, maybe it doesn't matter. I'll probably end up deleting this but I needed to type it out. Thanks for reading if anyone does. Bye.
  8. Kunoichi

    R.I.P Jenni

    Amen. May she rest in peace and prayers are with the family. Well said Dino. God bless them all and give them peace and strength in this hard time.
  9. They say that being grateful can help mental health healthiness in and of itself, no matter the disorder. Soooo I'm starting a thread on it Just say one thing you are grateful for and try not to do repeats in the following days 1. Grateful I have people who love me and that teach me how to be loved.
  10. Kunoichi

    Bipolar mixed state?

    Hey Llaura, I get this. I get racing thoughts, paranoia, mild hallucinations. I do not get the "high" like hypomanic. But i literally cannot stop my head, cannot stop my body etc. So often times I will go on a severe cleaning spree. That can occupy and cause my body intense pain (which is how I guess my body wants to "calm down" without realizing that it isn't good for me). The other side of this at the same time is am severely depressed (which sounds like it can't exist between the hypomanic but it does) and I feel like all I want to do is end myself. So the suicidal thoughts get on a very high rise. And with the mixed feelings, I have the racing thoughts often of suicidal ideation to paranoia to fear and more. It is very difficult for me to control what is going on. I haven't gotten advice on how to deal with it. No one. They just tell me to "not think about it". That isn't a possibility. Just wanted you to know you weren't alone. <3 Kunoichi
  11. Kunoichi

    chat room link not working - server error?

    Chat room via MIRC is working. I don't know if this is the case with Java however, since I don't use it. So if it wasn't working that day, it is now
  12. Dino, Please do not leave coming on here. We love you and we like to hear from you. I want you to keep talking, keep venting and its okay to deal with it. I'm so sorry your panic is so severe. You can keep living and you can keep living as best you can with what you have. Thinking of you always hun. Love Kelly
  13. Put it in facebook but adding it here, Happy Birthday Jen!!!!
  14. *ninja hugs* to you YGG. I feel the same. Though I'm not going anywhere I assure you. Just having a bit of a struggle and can't say how active I'll be in forums or chat currently. But i wanted to write this and felt the need to, so there it is.
  15. I want to really thank those in my life who have really been there for me this last few months. Whether that was a simple phone call, listening to me when I was vulnerable and needed a shoulder to cry in, just saying "I care" or "I'm praying". Or the simple "i love you", the hugs, opening up to me. Everything. Whether you realize it or not, you caring means the world to me. Saying "I am here. I care. I'm not going away". I know I am human, I'm not always easy to deal with. In fac...t, I am often weak in faith, prone to melachonly and seemingly least usable person. But people stay anyways. That unconditional love astounds me. I truly do not "get it". But I am grateful for it. So thank you. Also want to thank you guys for making me laugh. For letting me share my feelings without judgement, without shoving aside my feelings into simple cliches of "think one way or another". Letting me just "be" in all my imperfections. Thank you and I love you all very much. Kelly PS. if you think you haven't been there, because maybe you weren't able to "fix" my problems or maybe I didn't tell you about what was going on, or maybe I was shut down to everyone..you still helped. This applies to everyone, whether they believe it or realize it. PSS. If anyone wants to copy/paste this to those they think need it..or well haven't heard it in case I'm not here much due to my own trials. Then please do so. I would start adding apologies for all my wrongs...all my humanness, but i think that list would be too long. God bless.
  16. Dino, I know you haven't been doing well. I know you ahve been getting hit with a thing after another. but..well wanted to remind you of the unconditional love that is here. That at least, for myself talking, I am here if you need it. I may not always be able to handle things, have advice, or know what to say. I may not always have time (speaking if like I need to go somewhere, 24/7 ability) but you can still PM me and i will still listen. *hugs* to you for your dad's passing. May God bless you and keep you in his loving arms. Love always kelly
  17. Cheerygirl, I didn't see this until today. I am going to post a forum in General discussion, I would like you to read beacause it does apply to you. To me, thoughts is one thing, actions are another, plans are another. I recently had a friend who tried to die. He was in a coma for a few days but made it out alright. I can relate at least to wanting accpetance. that even though i am experiencing thoughts i find despicable, that people will say "well i am here for you, even through this." Well I am extending that. I can't say I'll have advice, that I'll know what to say or that I'll even be able to do well with it. But I can listen and I can say that "I am not leaving you, or running away, no matter your thoughts." Hell, I'll be honest. Suicide is a hard subject for me. I know close hand and have nearly died so many times that it seems like its almost expected. But..I know that its not the road I want. I do agree, are people in chat qualified? No. Not in a professional sense. Can we listen? (provided mentally/emotionally can handle it). then yeah. I don't know if you still have thoughts of suicide now. I know that I do..at last when i'm severely depressed or its a sudden thought out of the blue. Its like when you have used that as a coping mechanism for so long, its harder to just get it to go away. Maybe it won't. That being said, i know none of this is eloquent or probably very helpful. Hell I just hope I'm not making things worse..but if you are willing to let someone in, let someone love you and what not (not saying you don't). For what it is worth, I'm here. You don't need to be a masquerade, no matter how appealing that is. That being said again, its something I do. I see it as a way that I'm afraid. I feel like all it will do is burden others, hurt others etc. But..i think its okay to feel that way. I think its human. I think its human to think of suicide, maybe not healthy but still human. So well I'm here if you need it, or want it. I may not be the best person, or the right person, but the offer is a standing offer. Love always Kelly
  18. It's true but that's part of the phobia. It is only way I feel safe. It seems stupid to alot of people and like it isn't a big deal..but it is for me. And I need to know its okay that I deal with it. I am working on not letting it be as effective on me (I was able to kill the bug this time which was a huge step for me) and I don't deal with it alot because don't see them alot. I keep the house immaculate but ya know, its normal with where i live, weather and such. but yeah. thanks at least for caring and reading Pog. As always, knowing someone cares helps me.
  19. Kunoichi


    Appreciate that Admin. Though I'm unsure if the ideas would be meeting with the goals of the site. I'll put something up when I'm able to.
  20. Kunoichi


  21. Glad to see you back and hope to see you in chat soon gwen. Take care
  22. Bless them Praying for both!!! *Hugs* to them
  23. Kunoichi

    Birthday Blues

    OUCH. That kind of sucks! Well I agree with massagemom. Throw another party This time keep everything to yourself! lol
  24. Kunoichi

    How many times???

    Well that goes back into what you were saying in the other thread you put in. Its acceptance that things are going to change, there is no way to control that. life changes, you yourself change and things around you change whether you want them to or not. Even when it seems like it hasn't, it has. So the question is not if you can go to a group and then assume you'll get "abandoned". That's just bringing the past to your present and not taking things on face value. In all actuality, you may have a group and may get alot out of it and say you move, then you can still take what you got out of it and find another group and start from there. I don't know. that is just my thinking. Not saying what you are thinking isn't valid or is "wrong", rather I don't know if its coming from a healthy perspective versus using your past as your point of reference.
  25. Kunoichi

    When "life" continues to re-traumatize you

    I think two things when it comes to this: 1. Yes we can definitely do self-sabatouging in terms of traumitizing events because as you said, we are used to it and therefore its a comfort zone. Isolating, not taking medication, not going to therapy etc etc would be some of the ways we can do this. And i can relate to this alot. 2. At times too when life events occur, we also can use it as "evidence" to stack on whatever our belief system is. For instance, if you want a job and happen to not get it. We use that as evidence that "I'm not good enough anyways, so I knew this would happen". Or say something that changes in life, since life is full of changes, we again use the past as a point of reference versus seeing the situation as it is occurring in the presence. I can relate and I have more thoughts on it but that's all I can put out there for now.