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LLaura

When "life" continues to re-traumatize you

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When life continues to re-traumatize you, in the form of repeated loss, separation, abandonment, etc for whatever reason, circumstance or situation, is that really another example of self-fulfilling prophecy?

Self-fulfilling prophecy being the phenomenon of consciously or sub-consciously recreating past traumatic events or circumstances as an attempt by the mind to somehow either create a situation it's familiar with (even if it's bad, it's predictable and therefore slightly less scary) or as a way to reenact the "scene" and try to alter it's ending, but you never really can because really you're trying, in the here and now, to change the past, which cannot be done.

So... anyone familiar with me and what I've been through have any comments or opinions on this re me? Or anyone relate with this type of pattern?

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I think two things when it comes to this:

1. Yes we can definitely do self-sabatouging in terms of traumitizing events because as you said, we are used to it and therefore its a comfort zone. Isolating, not taking medication, not going to therapy etc etc would be some of the ways we can do this. And i can relate to this alot.

2. At times too when life events occur, we also can use it as "evidence" to stack on whatever our belief system is. For instance, if you want a job and happen to not get it. We use that as evidence that "I'm not good enough anyways, so I knew this would happen". Or say something that changes in life, since life is full of changes, we again use the past as a point of reference versus seeing the situation as it is occurring in the presence.

I can relate and I have more thoughts on it but that's all I can put out there for now.

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I haven't finished the book, but I remember clearly in Judith Herman's Trauma and Recovery (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Judith_Lewis_Herman), she states that it is an after effect of trauma. People who live with PTSD often relive those events in their own lives. I think both the "comfort" and also the "recreation of events" theories are both plausible. Though it does take a lot of work for people like us to understand our fear, our "inexplicable" reactions to menial events and our emotional states, I don't think it's okay to postulate on real PTSD symptoms as a system of excuse.

It's really not acceptable to keep blaming victims for their trauma. People with PTSD have to be STRONG. That is what is required of us. Everyday. No breaks. To say that a person is experiencing psychological trauma b/c they choose to is a load of horse $hit. Sorry, but I don't blame my circumstances on anything other than ME. That is the difference between someone who is using excuses and someone who is taking responsibility. I embody STRENGTH.

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